•Thinking Out Loud (True Story)•
Where is my mother?.....
The one I lost when I was around nine years old., she went out looking for an answer., an answer for a question planted in my mind right after my eyes witnessed the most painful and devastating episode in the history of my heart.
Mom! where are you?
Why aren't you making eyes contact with me any more?
are you ashamed?
I'm not trying to judge you., all I want is to hug you.
Look at me mom! Look into my eyes and you'll see how much I miss you mom!
I don't need an answer for that old question anymore., the time has passed by me, teaching me, breaking me and making me better everyday.
I understand you, respect you and love you.
My body has grown and I know I look strong, but the little boy in me is weak without you mom!
Mom! I know I said I wasn't going to judge you and I did the opposite, I did it out of anger, I grew up angry at you., angry because I felt you failed me, angry because I thought You didn't love me no more., but then I realized that you didn't failed me., you failed to yourself, and with the time I came to the understanding that it is not my place to judge you.
You did what you did and that's between you and yourself.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I know I haven't been able to make you proud, It's not like I haven't tried, maybe my voice wasn't loud enough to make you look., but now that you are here, would you like to hear some of the stories about my life?
You will probably find it interesting!
What Am I saying?
You can't hear me mom!
I forgot for a while I've been thinking out loud.
To be continued......
~Claudio Alvarado~
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